Dan Bilzerian to Parlay Instagram King into US President 2016

Runner runner: GOP candidate Rand Paul and potential also-ran Dan Bilzerian hunkered down to some heads-up liar’s poker recently. We’re pretty sure Dan cleaned Rand’s clock. (Image: controversialtimes.com)

Dan Bilzerian is throwing his hat in the ring, or should we say his shirt, for the 2016 presidential election.

Consistently posing with scantily-clad and topless women aboard private jets and yachts, the former poker pro, self-proclaimed “sexual philanthropist,” and “King of Instagram” doesn’t come with the stereotypical traits of a legitimate presidential candidate, but perhaps that’s what makes him so attractive.

In an exclusive event posted by Tablelist, an online and mobile table reservation service, Dan plans to launch “Bilzerian ’16” on Wednesday, June 14th in New York City at the Marquee club. General admission prices vary based on gender, because when you’re Dan Bilzerian, sexism is not only tolerated, but embraced. So it will be $40 tickets for females, and $55 for males.

This Is a Joke, Right?

The pathway to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue has never been built on professional poker and Instagram posts, which is why many in the political arena, most of whom had never even heard the name Dan Bilzerian before this week, are discrediting his campaign as nothing more than a publicity stunt.

But Bilzerian has showed an interest in politics in the past, and most recently sat down in April with Sen. Rand Paul (R-Kentucky), a 2016 GOP candidate, for a game of liar’s poker. After competing against the senator, Bilzerian posted to his social media accounts, “Rand Paul is a terrible liar, and likes guns which means he will most likely make a good president #Bilzerian16 #LiarsPoker.”

So what would a Bilzerian campaign platform look like, you ask?

Gun laws would likely be Bilzerian’s primary issue should he actually make this campaign legit. In February, he released a public service announcement on gun safety and firearms for the Bureau of Land Management. The PSA, which many described as a lackluster performance by Bilzerian, was part of a plea deal stemming from his arrest for being in possession of bomb-making equipment.

Perfect credentials for a presidential candidate, of course.

In addition to supporting the second amendment, one might assume Bilzerian would lead a rather aggressive foreign policy as it relates to matters of national security. As for the gambling community, it would be a welcomed thought to have a commander-in-chief who finally unequivocally supports online poker legalization and expansion.

One-Outer Shot

Okay, all joking aside, Bilzerian is unquestionably a dark horse, long shot, perhaps nothing more than a joke. But considering a recent Washington Post/ABC News survey found “The Terminator,” “Darth Vader,” and the shark from “Jaws” to be more favorable than all of the leading candidates in the 2016 election, Bilzerian shouldn’t be counted completely out.

However, to win the Republican ticket (although Bilzerian seems better suited as a Libertarian Party offering) candidates must appeal to the religious right, and that certainly doesn’t bode well for a man who threw a naked porn star off his roof into his pool last May.

Today’s candidates must appeal to their party’s base, and assuming Bilzerian runs on the GOP ticket, he will have to change his festive habits that many on the right see as immoral. In the end, the “King of Instagram” might not be the best candidate, but he’s surely the most entertaining.

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